From Poor Perspective

I read a really good post from the perspective of a man named Eric, who spent nearly ten years trying to work his way out of poverty.  It's his take on some of the main issues that contribute to being poor (in the U.S.) and how the situation might compare for people who are not poor.  There are moments when I can just imagine some people who "have" saying "this is stupid, why didn't you just...*insert easy fix here*" but I really appreciate that he put all if it out there and then some, taking time to respond to those and other questions and comments in the commentary section which is usually riddled with not nice people.  On this occasion, however, it seemed like a lot of people could relate not only to Eric's life but to his compassion.  People commented, openly admitting their non-impoverished lives, and yet still were able to recognize and support Eric's theories and shoot down some people who just don't seem to get it even when they outwardly state some of the major flaws in their "comparable" situations.

Poverty is a compound issue because any issue that may be small for the "average" person is that much more expensive in dollars, in time, and in energy, based on the fact that it is generally not the only issue they have.  I urge you to take a look at this, even if you already think you "get it" and even MORE so if you "get that people are lazy and are good at making excuses. (*note sarcasm)"  A lot of poor people are too busy to make excuses.  So do yourself a favor;  Read the article, gain some new perspective, recognize what it's like to see or face all of these obstacles at once.

I was able to look at this list and relate to so many points, and I'm a college-educated middle class adult.  I can only imagine what my life would be like if I didn't have people who supported me financially when I needed it in the past, or who didn't offer me shelter when I didn't have any money for rent, or who didn't encourage me and even take their own time to help me search for job opportunities when I was having a hard time encouraging myself and finding time to be able to work AND search for a better option.  I can't remember what it was like to take care of my apartment alone, to make every meal on my own, and I can't remember a time when I didn't feel that I had a safety net in case something were to go wrong.  I am so lucky...a lot of us are and I'm not sure that we all take the time or even think to realize it.

So this is a "thank you."  Thank you to everyone who has ever helped me.  Thank you to everyone who has ever taught me or showed me what it is to help others.  Thank you to my husband for not making me do it all alone anymore.  Thank you to Eric for writing about poverty from first-hand experience from "the other side" now that you've "made it out."  Thank you to the people in the comment section for understanding, for recognizing that a split second can change an entire reality for people or that poverty can be your challenge from birth with generations of it built up.

There's a way out.  There are people that can help.  

There are people that understand.  You can do it.

To see Eric's article click here.

Who stops bullying?

"That Jew" Video...

Suicide prevention...being better humans

There IS such a thing as goodness and decency in the world!

As told by Matthew Morris on his personal experience tonight:

"People always say there's no such thing as goodness or decency in the world anymore. 

Earlier tonight when my family was driving home, a car in front of us was t-boned by a man who ran a red-light. The car skidded all the way up to the sidewalk. 

Immediately our whole family jumped out of the car and ran to see if the people in the wrecked car were okay. While we did that, a gentleman from nearby who witnessed the crash sprinted over to help as well. The 3 people in the car were, thankfully, not injured severely, but were in shock and very hysterical. While my mother and the other man talked to the victims to keep them calm, a woman came over and called 911, and her husband helped my brother and I clear the wreckage off the road. The paramedics showed up and helped the people to safety and took them to the hospital. While what happened was frightening and disturbing to see, the way those other people acted was amazing. 

They acted calmly and graciously and went out of their way to help the people in the accident when they could have gone about their business. 

Yeah, there is a lot of bad in the world, but that situation reminded me that there damn well still is good as well. Sorry for the essay status, but I wanted to share that, because those people made my day."

To that, we say: 

There IS goodness and decency in the world...

and if you can't see it...be it!

White people ask questions to other white people

Barbie: Back to the roots

Invented by a mother to inspire her children, Barbie had somehow lost her original purpose, a lot of inches in the midsection, and her ability to stand up straight as a real-life human given the proportions she developed through the years.  Now, Barbie is going back to the roots, starting with the way that we perceive women.  Barbie's new campaign asks us to "imagine the possibilities."  It hopes to inspire young girls and women to reach for their dreams, whatever they may be, and to dream big.  Bravo, Barbie!  You're becoming a woman of the 21st century! ...now if only you could get your proportions back to normal...

Another reason to love Jose Mujica...and get some perspective on Time

People are good. #NooneInTheMud

Do you "give a shit?" (pardon my French)

Do you "give a shit?"  About anything?  About everything?  Guess what?  You aren't alone.  If you want a soliloquy to help explain yourself to the world, I suggest to start memorizing this post.

I give a shit, too.  If you care as much as I think you do, feel free to come back.  

You've got friends here :)  And the world needs people like you...to remind the world to care.

*I also want to stop to brag for a moment because I spelled "soliloquy" right on my first attempt...I even had to check it because I was afraid maybe autocorrect wasn't working...because I give a shit about grammar and spelling.  Mrs. Brady would be proud.

Have Clean Water? Be thankful.

Battery is dying, I'm one bar closer to humanity...

500 smiles down, a lifetime to go!

The gem inside...

You absolutely MUST read this!

...Must I, though?

I've often wondered about this when people tell me I have to do something:

...are we utilizing the correct vocabulary?  Do I really HAVE to or would you just prefer that I do?

While this is a latent question that only really surfaces when I hear someone ask "can I go to the bathroom" and my inner-English-teacher silently shouts "MAY YOU," I was blindsided by an article I clicked on accidentally earlier which discusses the difference between "should" and "must" (hence the title of this post).

I have more and more often questioned the things I am told (verbally or otherwise) that I SHOULD do.  There are conflicting messages, of course: societal pressures of what is "normal," my parents being my cheerleaders and telling me to "go for the gold" and "be whatever I want to be," and at the same time hoping that I choose something that works in society and that doesn't make me a stranger to it.

I think I'm torn.  I want the "should" because supposedly I should...right?  But the Must is the ever-constant tugging at me, making me defiant in the face of hoity-toity-ness and greed and hatred and evil and being unkind.  Even as I write, though, I don't necessarily believe that society or culture say that we should be THOSE things...so why do I feel so rebellious against them?  Maybe society says nothing at all about those things and to say anything at all is to be rebellious and to yield (FINALLY!) to our inner "Must."

I find myself hating "the nine to five"...I don't think I know a single human being who says they LOVE the nine to five.  What does this all MEAN?  That we all KNOW that we must not do it, but that we SHOULD?  Who said so?  Clearly no one I've ever spoken to about it.  Do you?  Do your friends or family?  Does anyone think we SHOULD do the nine to five?  If not, then how did it become the "should" that our inner "must" is rebelling against and why is it so hard to break free of?
One of my favorite parts of this article is where the author pulls a quote from the book she bases it on:

Must is different. Must is who we are, what we believe, and what we do when we are alone with our truest, most authentic self. It’s that which calls to us most deeply. It’s our convictions, our passions, our deepest held urges and desires — unavoidable, undeniable, and inexplicable. Unlike Should, Must doesn’t accept compromises.

Must is when we stop conforming to other people’s ideals and start connecting to our own — and this allows us to cultivate our full potential as individuals. To choose Must is to say yes to hard work and constant effort, to say yes to a journey without a road map or guarantees, and in so doing, to say yes to what Joseph Campbell called “the experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonance within our innermost being and reality, so that we actually feel the rapture of being alive.”

Choosing Must is the greatest thing we can do with our lives.

...Just TRY and tell me that those words don't stir up the "Must" in you, anxious to explode into being, existence, life...just TRY to tell me you don't relate with every fiber as you read the words about your inner self.  I doubt that you can (I know that I can't) and yet it is quite likely that you are someone that is doing something you should...most of the time.  My hope for you, though, is that your should begins to meld with your must in such a way that your "must" DRIVES your "should."

I must travel the world because my inner self believes that is what I should do in order to fulfill my purpose and life on this planet for the brief time I am here!  Fulfilling our purpose is something society tells us we should do...this is a good combination of should and must that you can justify...

I must use my skills and passions to help others because it is the thing that MOST makes me feel alive and I should do it because it is good for society and for others.  "Must" is for me...the reason others give for my must-actions, in this case, is the "should."

In the end, you already know, what others say will not determine how well you live your life.  It will not determine if you are a good or a bad person, if you are accomplished or not.  If you do not do what you MUST, though...if you do not comply with the fibers of your being that beckon you away from the norm toward whatever your true calling is...then you will fail yourself...and THAT is the greatest failure of all.  So do what you must, and feel free to tell people that whatever their desire for your life is (from the outside perspective) - they should start using the correct vocabulary for it.

Inspired by The Crossroads of Should and Must.

Bubble Gum Love

Transformation Thursday? It starts with I can.

I've shared this before but it is absolutely 1000% worth posting over and over again.

People struggle.  We ALL struggle.  Life is hard.  We overdo ourselves.  Something else outdoes us.  We get down on ourselves (and sometimes others do too).  We have moments, though.  We have moments of brilliance and hope and excitement and belief that even though life is tough, WE ARE TOUGHER.

I once heard that 30 seconds of courage is all you need...I think that applies here, too.  30 seconds of courage, of belief, of "I can do this" that get you from the couch to your feet, from the "I can't" to the "I will" from the "I'm not" to the "I can be!"

This video gets me every time.  I think it reminds me that we have a limited time.  We shouldn't take "no" for an answer when it comes to our health and our lives...we should find the answers, we should find the support, we should find encouragement to make ourselves better people and we shouldn't stop until we're doing what we hoped we might someday be capable of.

Life is tough.  Be tougher.  He can.  I can.  You can.  Be the change.

Turning and turning and turning...his ship around...

Change Comes to Those Who Work for It

It may come slower than they'd hope for, but women around the world - victims of rape, domestic violence, communal violence, and oppression by their traditional communities for the sole fact that they were born females - are making big changes.

I read an uplifting post about women who were beaten for selling goods in their towns where this was considered acceptable only for men.  After being beaten, and finding that her husband had done nothing to defend her honor or life during her hospital stay, she decided along with some other women to start a village FOR women and led BY women.  While disturbing to note that men had gone so far as to blockade the entry to the female-only towns and even to beat the women in front of tourists who give them their livelihood through visits and the buying of traditional jewelry and crafts, it is incredibly invigorating to hear that the women persevered, bought land where blockades had occurred, and have continued to fight for their rights to life free of violence and oppression, both as women and as human beings.

While destroying traditional patriarchal norms of their people, they are creating new traditions that accept women of all ages and their children.  They accept male visitors who are invited in but they are not allowed to stay.  Other similar communities are cropping up nearby, with different rules and regulations and hierarchies, but all with the same goal in mind: to change the world for women, to make it a better place where they have voices and power over themselves.

You can check out the full story and some gorgeous images of these world-changing women by clicking here.

Recovering Lost Food...

True Entertainers...musicians with gusto!